Greek (Yogurt) Tragedy

I’m one of those snobs who generally likes to talk about how things (mass transit, coffee, pears, olive oil, newspapers) are better in foreign countries. But I make an exception for “greek yogurt,” which I first had years ago while abroad (it was called “turkish yogurt” but it was the same thing), which I don’t like very much. But one of my ThinkProgress colleagues has a much more serious problem. Henceforth, an anonymized version of the team’s group Skype chat on the subject:

CAPSTER ONE: you know what i hate?
greek yogurt
but Girlfriend X thinks i like it
Matt Yglesias: that sucks
CAPSTER ONE: so she keeps buying it for me
CAPSTER TWO: Greek yogurt hates you
Matt Yglesias: greek yogurt is bullshit
CAPSTER ONE: and then i have to eat it
CAPSTER THREE: Yeah, that is not really very good.
CAPSTER ONE: and pretend it was great
i’m trapped
Matt Yglesias: why don’t you just tell her?
CAPSTER ONE: can’t
the schirade has gone on too long
Matt Yglesias: why not?
ah
CAPSTER ONE: years
CAPSTER THREE: I would just tell her.
CAPSTER FOUR: i like it

This is what Thoreau had in mind when he wrote about lives of quiet desperation.

9 responses to “Greek (Yogurt) Tragedy

  1. I suggest your friend try the honey flavored kind. It’s better. Then he can just ask for it every time, and at least it’s more palatable

  2. Indeed, the one that comes with the little separate compartment for honey is great. Moving the spoon between the two compartments in the right proportions is challenging enough that I consider it cooking.

  3. This is insane. Greek yogurt is awesome. I highly recommend it with my cereal of choice — Cracklin’ Oat Bran.

  4. Greek yogurt is an important ingredient for making tzatziki–the standard (American store) yogurt doesn’t quite cut it. But eating it by itself is less than tasty.

  5. capster one just needs to implement a program designed to move away from greek yogurt in a neutral way, GFX doesn’t need to know that he NEVER liked it and lied about it for years, just that his tastes have changed for one reason or another. Ex: “You know this greek yogurt hasn’t tasted so great lately, maybe they changed it somehow” or “You know I was thinking I’d like to explore the world of yogurt and experiment with some new kinds”.

    Or just go with “I’ve always hated greek yogurt and our entire relationship is a fraud”, you know, whatever!

  6. This is exactly the type of issue that you should talk about to get onto This American Life. This is the type of banal “common man” type problem that has people complaining constantly about the bourgeoisie.

  7. i second bailey. greek yogurt is so creamy and delicious! add some fruit on that jawn, eat it up, all day every day.

  8. surely you mean “charade”

  9. Really, any kind of sweet saucy thing will do. I love honey, as others have mentioned, but Trader Joe’s has this fantastico blueberry syrup that is also really tasty on Greek yogurt. It’s the sweet syrupy thing plus creamy tart thing that really gets me. I’ve had pre-flavored Greek yogurt before and I just didn’t think it was as good. The way the honey firms up just a little bit because of the cool yogurt is just such a great textural element.

    But.. agreed with the other commenter: just stop eating it and if she asks, tell the GF you’re getting tired of it. “I’m kinda bored with Greek yogurt these days… but I’ve been wanting to try X snack instead.” Yay.

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