Do These Candies Look Pornographic to You?

By Sara Mead


They do to one British father:

Mr Simpkins, of Pontefract, West Yorkshire, said: “The lemon and lime are locked in what appears to be a carnal encounter. The lime, whom I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face.”

Seriously, y’all?? FWIW, I’ve never eaten or even seen these candies and have no views on their merits as sugary comestibles.  But I can see the packaging, and while it does look weird, trippy, and vaguely creepy, I think Mr. Simpkins needs to get a grip. Also,  I resent the gendered and heteronormative assumptions implicit in the latter half of his statement.


10 responses to “Do These Candies Look Pornographic to You?

  1. Yes, they look pornographic, and it’s hilarious, and I would absolutely buy them because of the packaging.

  2. I agree with Danner. I admit to having a mind that tends in that direction, but absolutely, it’s all about the (fun and happy) fruit sex.

  3. I don’t know what that is, but it’s not shaped like a lime.

  4. The orange is clearly about to perform oral sex on the green thing, and it appears they’re both really looking forward to it.

  5. I’m with KCinDC, in that whatever the green thing is, it’s not a lime. Notice that greenie is the only character with arms and legs. So what I think we have here is far more disturbing than some fruit engaging in sexual hijinks… but cross-kingdom debauchery. Sickening, really.

  6. These candies are sold all over Europe and are made by a German candy maker called Haribo (which also makes the best gummy candies in the world, esp. the bears). If you’ve seen German ads for anything else….well, these slightly pornographic wrappers for candy won’t really surprise you.

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  8. Considering you can’t pronounce the name of the product without *sounding* like you’re having sex, this isn’t really surprising.

  9. Drew wins this thread.

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