Stop Having a Boring Life!

By Matthew Yglesias

The Slap Chop is a textbook example of an attempt to sell you a device that solves absolutely nothing. If you want to chop stuff, you should chop it with your knife. If for some reason your knife doesn’t chop stuff, you should buy a better knife. The advertisement, however, is a brilliant piece of performance art:

But whatever criticisms you might make of the product, the refrain “stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life” is something I can embrace. People shouldn’t eat boring stuff.

15 responses to “Stop Having a Boring Life!

  1. That’s really awesome. At first I was confused as to what set the Slap Chop apart from innumerable other mini-choppers on the market but then he demonstrated that it “opens like a butterfly” and I was sold!

    Here’s where I admit I received a non-Slap Chop mini-chopper for Christmas… give me a break, it’s hard to come up with a list of inexpensive gifts! But yeah, I can’t envision a time I would ever want to use it.

  2. I guess I’m a real putz.

    I don’t know if I have the “slap chop” but I use a similar piece all the time.

    Does this make me a loser?

  3. Just checked. I’ve got the “Pampered Chef” version. And I know, the pampered chef stuff is as overpriced as can be.

  4. My parents have something like that. I mocked it mercilessly until I was visiting their place, needed to chop a handful of nuts, and didn’t want to wash the cutting board (again). Think of it as something to use when dragging out the food processor would be overkill but a knife would be messier than necessary. I was pleasantly surprised.

  5. I CANNOT believe nobody has linked to the Steve Porter Remix version. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWRyj5cHIQA

  6. Didn’t this guy get arrested for biting off a hooker’s lip or something? Not making any more infomercials should have been a condition of his probation.

  7. @V

    No charges were filed.

  8. tuna casserole and rice pudding

    “people shouldnt eat boring stuff.”

    why?
    i think that should be changed to, “people shouldnt eat boring stuff all of the time.”
    many people like rituals.
    isnt boring stuff sometimes the same thing as comfort food.
    things that dont change…that are comforting old reliables?
    new things are certainly great, but “boring stuff” is often the glue that holds everything together.
    “boring stuff” is highly underrated in our culture.
    the abhorrence for “boring stuff” is why people will pull out their credit cards for “slapchops,” “shamwows” and every other thing on the home shopping networks and rampant infomercials.
    the promise of something new and different that will make things easier, more beautiful, different.

  9. slapchop and shamwow

    i think some products succeed just because of their name.
    “slapchop” could be a repetitive old logger’s song or for cutting wood in the forest.
    some words just fit together in an inimitable, subliminal way, and the phrases develop a life of their own.
    “slapchop” is one of them.
    empowering, raw efficiency.
    if it had a different name, it wouldnt be as successful.
    just like “shamwow” is so absurd…it could be the child of “shamu.” it just seems to be a likeable product, right off the bat.
    words are magic. they have a life of their own, regardless of what they actually mean.

  10. the tv commercial is down-right annoying, and almost insulting. no matter how much you slapchop, tuna stays boring. however, if the product is the same as the one we bought years ago, it’s good. it’s robust, cleans easily, and actually chops well. ours was a “swiss” version (so it had to be good, right?), that we bought at a fair, where we saw a similar sales performance. from the looks of it, it comes from the same manufacturer. except for the commercial, we have no complaint.

  11. Most of that food had to be cut with a knife in order to fit the slap-chop. Noted for the record.

  12. I never thought I’d see Matthew Yglesias, of all people, endorse the Green Lantern theory of knife efficacy. What if there were something that was better at cutting than a knife? That would only mean you needed a better knife?

  13. Alternatively, you could *sharpen your existing knife*

  14. Best part of the commercial: “You’re gonna love my nuts.”

    This line should be used at every holiday party.

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